Today's smile.... : ) If you laugh, even better!
A laugh is a smile that bursts.
~Mary H. Waldrip
...some of the winning submissions to The Washington Post's yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternative meanings for common words.
Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.
Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has
Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
Negligent, adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only
Gargoyle, n. Olive-flavoured mouthwash.
Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline.